Bi-Weekly Dream Report – Spectacular Lucid Dreams, Therapeutic Offerings, and a Revelation…

11 Mar

I feel like I’m making real progress here in attaining and understanding the nature of becoming conscious in the dream-state. I also had a “big moment” where a dream I had showed to me something I couldn’t see or understand in my waking life.

Lucid Dream # 1

One of them involved the peculiar strangeness dreams are so known for. I became lucid in the dream and began to show off my skills to the people whom I was with in the dream. They were astonished as I moved things with my mind and then ran up the wall and onto the ceiling. One of my friends was particularly amazed by these feats.

I then woke up to write down the dream – but ah! This is where it gets odd! It was a false wakening – I woke up in the dream, in the same apartment of my friends that the lucid dream just took place in.

I laughed to myself as I noted some of the subtle differences I saw in the apartment now as compared to the lucid dream I had.

As I was looking around, my friend woke up too and came into the kitchen to see me. She had streaks of tears running down her cheeks and looked as if she’d just gone through a cathartic experience.

I knew what had happened – she remembered the dream, too!

And she wanted me to take her back, but I couldn’t, because we were actually awake.

I held her to comfort her and then woke up – for real this time.

Lucid Dream #2

The other lucid dream I had really gets to me because it involves something I’ve wanted so badly to do while lucid: soar through space.

I had climbed to the top of a dome structure from the inside out, and opened the top door. I know I’m dreaming. Upon opening this door the whole of space is revealed to me and I realize, here it is – my chance to fly through space!

And yet I couldn’t. Honestly, it was…terrifying. The enormous open space was non-comforting… it was just too open. I tried to fall into with my back but it didn’t really work. And that is all I remember.

Therapeutic Offerings?

I was very very upset about something recently. However, I didn’t clearly understand why. I knew my reaction was more emotional than logical and yet I couldn’t pin the reason down for any of it.

That night I had a dream that made clear to me that it was trauma from the past, subconsciously associated with the current event, that was deeply troubling me.

Because of this, I was able to let go of almost all my ill feelings as I realized what I was truly upset about was not what was happening now, but what happened years ago.

It’s really amazing to me how the subconscious can piece together a dream scenario like this by peeling out events and people from your past & present and piecing them together with a storyline to represent the internal struggle going.

This is something inside me that’s putting all this together, but under the surface.

Fuck! It really blows my mind.

And it really makes me wonder about the nature of the self and causes me to question how well we really understand our motivations, thoughts, and feelings.

And a Revelation…

I’ve realized that lucid dreaming shouldn’t be seen as a skill that you master. You don’t conquer the dreaming mind and control it. You gotta work with yourself, not against yourself.

I believe my experiences with Calea Z. recently were so disappointing because I had a mindset of conquering and controlling the dream instead of moving in sync with the dream.

Becoming conscious in my dreams is something that will come about not out of force or mastery or conquering or domination, but out of moving in sync with my dreaming mind.

It’s about resonating with my dreaming self and my (sub)conscious.

I imagine the dreaming mind like a river flowing one way. The way I was using Calea Z. was akin to walking upstream against the river in an attempt to overtake it.

The river will naturally resist such tendencies, and push against you.

I think to induce lucid dreams I must go into it with a different mindset – one of jumping in the river and going for a swim downstream. To really flow with things as they are, and then, perhaps, I’ll be able to grab a rock along the way to hold onto, get a look at my surroundings, and perhaps change the course of the river itself.

I’m reading Eagles Quest by Fred Alan Wolf and there was passage in this book about how his dominant, controlling scientific training was impeding on his progress using ayahausca. It was this passage that led me to think about how I was using lucid aids such as Calea Z with the wrong intention and mindset.

Another book I’m reading, Control Your Dreams, speaks of this as well on another level. The authors speak of accomplished meditators and lucid dreamers who report that focusing a meditation on having lucid dreaming strangely has the opposite effect. But with meditation alone, in the early morning hours of the day, without any specific focus on lucid dreaming, they reported that they were very likely to experience lucid dreams.

One Response to “Bi-Weekly Dream Report – Spectacular Lucid Dreams, Therapeutic Offerings, and a Revelation…”

  1. Zataod March 16, 2007 at 2:53 pm #

    My experience has shown the harder I try to have lucid dreams, the more elusive they become. I think part of the process is learning to put forth the effort without being overly attached to the outcome.

    I do think lucid dreams should be cultivated, but with a subtlety that doesn’t drive them away.

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